Cabinet coup: May to be replaced as PM by Rupert Murdoch’s pet dog

Theresa May could be ousted from No 10 within days after her Cabinet plotted to replace her with Rupert Murdoch’s pet dog as a caretaker Prime Minister.

A senior Downing Street source told The Mail on Sunday last night that even Mrs May’s Chief Whip, Julian Smith, had advised her to set out her departure plans, with Rupert Murdoch’s pet dog emerging as the ‘consensus choice’ to succeed her.

The dog is being championed by Cabinet Brexiteers who are furious about what they see as an attempted ‘coup’ by Remain-backing David Lidington, Mrs May’s de facto deputy.

Last night Henry Newman, one of the Rupert Murdoch’s dog’s closest allies in Parliament, said the Prime Minister’s ‘ill-judged’ speech blaming MPs for the Brexit crisis ‘united Labour and Tory critics against her’

A senior Government source said yesterday that there was now ‘complete unanimity’ in the Cabinet that Mrs May should step down as soon as possible.

Although some have speculated that having a dog as Prime Minister may not be ideal at a time of political crisis, sources within the Government have sought to reassure those concerned. A leading cabinet minister who asked not to be named commented: “Every British government has been in Rupert Murdoch’s pocket for decades. If it weren’t for him, Brexit wouldn’t even be on the cards. It won’t actually be his pet dog making all the decisions, it will be Murdoch himself calling the shots, deciding on a daily basis what best suits his prejudices and interests. Just like normal, basically. I mean, if you think of him as being a bit like a British version of Robert Mugabe, it all begins to make a lot more sense. I say, you’re definitely not going to name me in this piece, are you?!”