Stunning photos show breathtaking scale of Friday’s MASSIVE pro-Brexit protest

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On Thursday evening Nigel Farage tweeted his outrage that Parliament had just voted to extend Article 50. Within seconds his well-oiled party machines were in operation, as word spread, buses were booked, and 17,410,742 people, every single one of whom shares his profound anger at this unconscionable affront to democracy and is ready to put all of his time, energy, livelihoods, personal freedom and physical safety at the disposal of the fight for sovereignty, prepared to march on Westminster for the largest demonstration the country had ever seen.
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I arrived about 1pm, by which point it was very hard to get anywhere near Parliament Square, let alone close to the House of Commons itself.
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At one point I was genuinely concerned for my safety. No one had – no one could have – anticipated such numbers.
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It’s hard to convey in a mere photo just how many ordinary British people had taken to the streets to express their fury at the news that Brexit probably won’t happen as scheduled. I would like to take this opportunity to apologise to Owen Jones, as I had taken with a pinch of salt his warnings that the country would spontaneously explode in revolt if Brexit were impeded for even a second. This photo shows how my complacency was completely misplaced. And this is on a weekday! Imagine the size of Saturday’s protest!!! Clearly those elements of the pro-Brexit campaigns who suggested they just organise a PR stunt in Royston Vasey because they simply don’t have the numbers for a large national protest, and in any case whenever there has been a demo in London the only people who turn up are football hooligans, which shows that the only argument against calling the whole fucking thing off, which is that there’d be a nationwide breakdown in social order, is wrong, were, er, wrong. I apologise for the previous sentence.
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Fortunately they had quickly arranged a platform so the voices of the popular heroes of the #Lexit movement could be heard by all whom had come from so far and wide, etc. From the left, Kate Hoey (MP); Jennifer Helen Jones, aka Baroness Jones of Moulsecoomb (FSA); Alexander Theodore Callinicos (SWP/StWC/UAF/LMHR/IS/IRG/KCL/SA/RTR/RAR/ERG), son of Honorable Ædgyth Lyon-Dalberg-Acton; Daniel Hannan (MEP), who gave a very moving speech inspired by the Disney film ‘Dumbo‘; Tommy Robinson (HMP TBC); and on the far-right, the smallest, ugliest, piece of shit, Nigel Farage himself (PBUH).
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These young women were among many schoolchildren who had marched spontaneously out of their classrooms in order to demand that they and their families be restricted for the rest of their lives to a tiny-minded, petty, resentful, alternately arrogant and insecure, shit-fooded, self-pitying, racist island ruled over by either a climate-lying plastic aristocrat who probably believes in FGM or another climate-lying tinpot floppy-haired sociopathic c*nt called Boris.
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By this point the crowds were immense. Some had speculated that potential pro-Brexit protestors may have been put off from expressing allegiance to a far-right cause by news of the mass murder perpetrated in New Zealand by someone whose values are not all that very very different from those of Farage, Rees-Mogg, Trump et al. By the way, it wasn’t me who said that, it was him. Anyway they were wrong, look at the photo
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Small placard, too many words, poor ‘typology’, I was told by someone I subsequently got talking to in the pub. Chiara reckoned the last line is a bit patronising but once I’d mansplained to her that it was supposed to be ironic she calmed down a bit.

UPDATE: This post has now been superseded by “reality”.

UPDATE UPDATE: There is an…explanation (not an excuse!!!) for the low numbers:

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…or alternatively:

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See you next Saturday.

(Ps Although Farage’s photo op was absolutely pitiful and much of the ridicule it was greeted with hilarious, we may be falling into a bit of a trap, in that images of hardy, mud-soaked and rain-sodden ordinary British volk, battling not just the elements but universal opprobrium in their vain pursuit of national destiny, is an emblematic instance of the mythology that Fintan O’Toole pinpoints as the inspiration for Brexit in ‘Heroic Failures’. I’m sure both the Jarrow marchers and Farage’s true political ancestors in 1920s Italy were treated with disdain in their day, so the negative coverage is unlikely to daunt those who, having no idea of or concern for the risks involved, still support a no deal Brexit. So let’s hope the cameras and hashtags move on and the whole thing is swiftly forgotten. As Trump has shown, for the modern far-right movement ridicule is nothing to be scared of, and images of vainglorious victimhood can actually rally people to the cause. It’s quite probable that the organisers knew it would provoke this reaction, and that’s why they decided to do it. #youutterhypocrite #yesIknow)

Lots of Corbynistas are demanding a new general election. What might that be like?

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(knock on door)

Hello?

Hi! Sorry to bother you. I’m sure you’ve heard there’s a general election coming up. I’m here to encourage you to vote for the Labour candidate. Which is me! Daniel Dongle, aspiring member of Parliament. Nice to meet you! Is that your dog??

It’s a…cat.

Ah! Ok. It looks a bit like…but we mustn’t essentialise! Now, I see you voted for us in 2017, much appreciated! Have you thought about how you might vote this time?

Well, it depends. What’s your position on Brexit?

We think austerity is completely unnec…

But where do you stand on Brexit?

I’m sure you’ll agree that the rise in homelessness is an absolute abom…

But do you still think the UK would be better off outside the EU?

Climate Change is the biggest emergency we have ever faced as a sp…

Should we remain in the Customs Union?

We wholeheartedly oppose the rise in xenophobia around the world in the l…

What alternative do you have to the Withdrawal Agreement?

Like AOC says, we need a Green N…

Is Labour prepared to whip its MPs to support a second referendum?

Trident is a total waste of m…

Isn’t it now pretty much incumbent on whoever’s in government to revoke Article 50?

Er…we believe in a Global Br…

My girlfriend’s from Poland. Will she be able to stay here after Brexit?

Rebuilding the NHS is…

What’s your position on the Irish border situation?

As Jeremy says, valuing the contribution immigrants make to British soc…

What’s Labour’s reaction to all the revelations about illegal practices by both leave campaigns?

Secure homes for..

Are you still in favour of Britain leaving the EU, even with no withdrawal agreement in place?

Err…(triumphantly) For the many, not the few!

OH, FUCK OFF!!!

(door slams)

The problem with Corbyn: he isn’t left-wing enough

Andy Beckett (‘We exclude the Labour left from British politics at our peril‘) makes some valid points about the ‘othering’ of the Labour left, which combined with Corbyn’s haplessness at managing the party and at communicating his agenda has seemingly led Labour to the brink of self-destruction.

It’s not only left-wingers who point out that much written about Corbyn is untrue. But there’s certainly at least one sense in which Corbyn himself is insufficiently left-wing: his inability to think dialectically, as shown by his insistence last week that poverty and the climate are “more important than Brexit”. Actually those three phenomenon are inherently and intimately interlinked. In Marxist terms, there is a section of the ruling class that wants the UK out of the EU so it can escape all forms of regulation, particularly with regard to taxation and the climate. The fact that involves making most people immediately much poorer and, in the medium term, making everybody dead, is a mere and not particularly regrettable side-effect. They know that climate change is real and that austerity and Brexit are economic suicide – their mission is to take advantage of the mounting chaos in order to stamp out democracy and human rights and loot what’s left of the State. Corbyn’s role should have involved exposing and challenging the machinations that underpin this agenda, but tragically, given that in any age the dominant ideas are those that reflect ruling class interests, what dominates in many nominally left-wing fora is a disguised form of extreme conservatism which presents itself as radical, mostly taking the form of conspiracy theorising and railing against whatever scapegoats are made available by any passing troll or bot – witness the ease with which far-right ideas you to and including anti-Semitic tropes are insinuated into Corbyn-supporting Facebook groups, or drop by the Labour List website to see the extent to which arrant nonsense about a “WTO Deal” Brexit has taken hold of those who, like Italian M5S supporters cheering on Salvini, think of themselves as on the left while doing a job for the far-right. (Ecco a shining example of someone doing just that.) Partly due to the loose populism in such slogans as “For the many, not the few” and talk of “elites” and “the Establishment”, Corbyn’s supporters include many who have fallen into the same puerile ideological mentality as much of the Italian (former) left – lazy, easily manipulable populism – and he and his leadership haven’t known how (or have been insufficiently motivated) to challenge that.

That Corbyn himself is unable to recognise that austerity, climate denial and Brexit all form part of a concerted neoneoconservative assault on democracy, social provision and basic human rights, one which is – shock! Horror! – even worse than the braindead neoliberalism of the neo-Blairites suggests that neither does he have the intellectual wherewithal to respond to the myriad challenges that face him and us; while his acknowledgement that climate destruction is a class issue is welcome, his dismissal of Brexit as a mere “constitutional question” displays an idiocy which it’s hard not to conclude is wilful. What Britain needs is a local version of AOC, someone talented at articulating a modern (as in green, intersectional and digitally savvy) left-wing agenda in the face of the opprobrium such a project will inevitably face. Of course, no one can click their fingers and make such a figure magically appear, and Corbyn’s agenda has much to recommend it despite the resistance it faces and despite his apparent inability to communicate it effectively. But some on the left need to stop pretending that he’s doing a great job or that his leadership is our best and only hope.

“Why aren’t the Brits panicking?”

There’s a thread on Reddit called “Why aren’t the Brits panicking?”. It was presumably started by someone from the States, given their choice of epithet. It’s certainly not a word I’d use to describe myself, what with its uncomfortable evocation of tabloids and expattery. I saw some right-wing troll (or, more probably, bot) on Twitter using the term ‘Britons’ in relation to Brexit, suggesting that his normative understanding of British identity draws on a mythical idea of pre-Roman/Norman/Windrush purity without jollof rice or vaccines.

Nonetheless, it’s a fair question. I’m a ‘Brit’, if you like, and I don’t appear to be panicking, despite the fact that in three weeks’ time there may be troops on the streets to quell potential food riots, and all sorts of infrastructures whose existence, let alone importance, I have remained blissfully aware of all my life could collapse overnight. (The amount of unknown unknowns is, inevitably, unknowable.) If there’s a glimmer of sanity in Theresa May’s head that scenario won’t quite come to pass (yet), but if so we can be sure that Nigel Farage and Tommy Robinson will be doing all they can to spark an immediate civil war and (in Farage’s case) will be given plentiful access to the airwaves to do so.

Philip K. Dick wrote that sometimes it is an appropriate response to reality to go insane, and this would appear to be an opportune moment to do so, except for the fact that people all around the world are very noticeably not panicking about rapidly rising temperatures or the return of the far-right to power in some of the world’s most powerful countries, which might give us pause to think: how do we “panic” if no one else seems to be doing so? Perhaps I am panicking without quite being aware of it. After all, we already have food stored under the bed and precautionary plane tickets booked for the end of the month. And yet, in the meantime, we still need to eat, sleep, see friends, take the baby to the park, go to work; there are Michael Jackson documentaries to watch, and subsequent arguments to pursue online with people who (mystifyingly) refuse to accept the facts; there are articles to read which reflect intelligently on how we should react to the final evidence of Jackson’s corruption: should we continue to play his music? Write it and him out of history? And yet, it’s been a central element in our shared emotional life. More, one might even say, then the European Union…

So what’s a reasonable reaction to news that shakes the ground on which one stands? It may be rational to panic, to scream and run away, but where do we run to? It is, in the words of this article, “easier not to believe” such terrifying truths, especially when, away from social media, so few people seem to be even slightly perturbed by what’s happening. Maybe our sense of how to behave is akin to how we construct our identities: in the words of the sociologist Charles Cooley, “I am not who you think I am; I am not who I think I am; I am who I think you think I am”. The reason that British people are not panicking is partly that other British people are not panicking. After all, not panicking is what we’ve all been doing on a wider scale in relation to even more terrifying news about our climate.

No amount of frozen metaphors about frogs in boiling water or memes of dogs in burning rooms can begin to do justice to our failure to respond adequately to collective existential threats. Michel Foucault talked about how power operates through a shifting process of normalisation, where even the most radical changes to our daily lives can be incorporated into our picture of the world, while Pierre Bourdieu developed the concept of habitus, according to which it’s practically impossible for us to think beyond the parameters of our working assumptions about our lives and our reality. Not only do we live in an environment saturated with reassuring messages about the future, we live, speak and breathe those messages, reproducing them in our thoughts, posts, conversations and actions. We see adverts for events that take place in April, May and beyond, myriad timescales which take no notice of March 29th, market imperatives that must supersede whatever happens in news headlines, just as everyday life and consumption has so far managed to outlive any number of terrorist atrocities or climate catastrophes in cities we visited just a few weeks or months before and just as the global market was able to incorporate the election of Trump, Bolsonaro and Salvini with nary a blink. When we were considering what to do at the end of March and trying to make plans for the following month, I made the following suggestion: Imagine we know there’s going to be a hurricane or a flood, one whole scale we can’t predict until just before it happens. But perhaps a better analogy, given that Brexit is first and foremost an ideological project, is a terrorist attack way beyond anything Isis could dream up; given the nature of such attacks, we don’t know whether it will hit the particular station or square we happen to be passing through, but it won’t stop us travelling or holidaying or going to work or shopping – although actually, you might want to strike that last one off the list, and the first and second come to think of it. As for our jobs… Dostoevsky wrote somewhere that the greatest strength and weakness of human beings is that we can adapt to any set of circumstances; post-modern society thrives on disruption, according to any number of Ted Talks. The statement that it’s easier to imagine the end of the world than the end of capitalism has been attributed to everyone from Frederic Jameson to Slavoj Žižek to (I seem to recall) Peter Andre. In such a setting it’s impossible to overcome the sensation that, as Thomas Pynchon puts it in ‘Against the Day’, “there will always be time”.

But perhaps, in the end, Brexit is not the cause of the (apparent absence of) panic, but rather its consequence. Maybe panic is setting in at the level of politics, and that’s what Brexit, much like Trump, Salvini et al, is an effect of. Maybe for many people the notion that their decision has somehow had an impact on world events serves to assuage the sense of doom and helplessness they feel in their daily lives.

In the meantime, then: Michael Jackson. I’m writing this in an airport. All around me people are going on with their lives: chatting, sipping coffee, unfolding pushchairs, tapping out sanctimonious diatribes about other people’s complacency on their devices. It’s soundtracked at this moment by some Motown classic which might be called ‘I believe you’. If I sit here long enough I’m sure to hear one of the totems of our culture: maybe ‘ABC’, ‘Rock with you’ (one of my personal favourites) or maybe (possibly, apart from the pedophilia, his nadir) ‘They don’t really care about us’. On the way into the terminal I saw a young woman wearing the same jacket Melania Trump when she went to sneer at terrified children ripped away fron their parents: ‘I DON’T REALLY CARE, DO YOU?’. I briefly thought about remonstrating with her, but didn’t want to create a scene. Which raises the question: how does one show that one cares? And related to that: what does it mean to panic? Maybe initiatives such as this and this can help us to, to borrow a phrase, take back control of our fears and frustrations in a way that’s doesn’t involve lashing out at conveniently-placed scapegoats.

Update: Someone on Reddit responded to this piece by accusing its writer (me) of being ‘ill-informed’, ‘stupid’ and ‘apathetic’. Here is another version written especially for him:

Having posted to his blog yet another diatribe about how Other People’s inertia, apathy, laziness, complacency, cowardice, greed, ignorance and selfishness were responsible for austerity, Brexit, Trump, Salvini, Climate Change and so on, and how it was not just incumbent upon Other People but actually pressing, urgent (and some or other synonym for those previous two words) for those aforesaid Other People to take action up to and including risking their personal relationships, livelihoods, freedom and physical safety to stop, overthrow and/or prevent those things, there really was no higher priority for Other People than that as it was a matter not just of principle but also of survival, so basically why weren’t Other People panicking or revolting, what was wrong with those Other People, like were they all fucking stupid or mad or evil or something like that, having typed all that, chosen a fitting image, selected some appropriate tags and clicked Upload, he caught the train to St. Albans, took a wander round the local gallery/museum and perused the street market, stopped for lunch in a pleasant café before visiting the cathedral and graffitiing the words ‘YES, WE ARE ALL TO SOME EXTENT APATHETIC AND COMPLACENT IN THE FACE OF SUCH TERRIFYING THREATS AND HORRIFYING REVELATIONS, WE TEND TO DENY OUR OWN ROLE IN QUIETLY ALLOWING ABUSE TO BE PERPETRATED, THAT’S KIND OF THE POINT’ on the walls of the 13th century crypt, and then catching the train back to London to spend the rest of the day reading a book about climate change denial, eating the remains of the curry he and his wife had ordered off Just Eat the previous evening and watching the rest of the Michael Jackson documentary.

Citizenship, securitisation and scapegoating

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I don’t know whether Shamima Begum has ever handled a weapon, but I do know that she holds a British passport which is presently null and void. She has no other passports, and since the UK has no formal constitution if you don’t have a passport you’re not a citizen. The Home Secretary’s decision thus makes her stateless, which is illegal under international law. Strangely the focus of the Guardian article is not on the fact that the Home Secretary, whose parents migrated here from Pakistan, is attempting to break international law. Maybe if a previous government had respected international law there wouldn’t be a war in Syria and there wouldn’t be armed policemen on the tube. Just a thought.

We used to live in Rome, where armed soldiers were a common sight around metro and train stations. Those soldiers are now under the direction of the de facto leader of a coalition government of neofascists and internet trolls who is the same person who will next year be signing my Italian passport, unless someone reads this first and decides to turn me down because they don’t agree with my political opinions. (I’m not about to go to Syria to cut people’s heads off, but at the same time I don’t think it was wrong for George Orwell et al to take up arms against a previous generation of European fascists.) One purpose of getting an Italian passport was to remain an EU citizen in the wake of Brexit, but that may be moot in any case if Salvini’s cohorts take over the EU Parliament in May and destroy the EU from within. The prospect of the people in Westminster prolonging Article 50 to keep the UK in the EU temporarily is becoming less likely because the UK mustn’t be allowed to participate in those elections. This ungodly mess helps to explain why everyone is talking about the damage Shamima Begum might do to vital national interests instead of the incalculable harm our own government is doing to all of our life chances. Yesterday a friend whose wife is also Italian got a letter from their child’s nursery specifying that vouchers for 3 year old children of EU parents won’t yet be stripped and “any future changes will be in line with the future immigration system”, which is less than reassuring in that we know that our government will readily take away people’s most basic rights whenever doing so might stop people talking about what’s happening to the economy as a result of the ongoing civil war in the Conservative Party, a war which David Cameron decided to try to resolve once and for all by spreading it to the entire country.

Who radicalised Shamima Begum to the point where she didn’t even blink at the sight of a severed head and thought the motives and means behind the Manchester attack understandable? What sort of people seek to promote politically-inspired violence against defenceless civilians, including children? Surely whoever encouraged impressionable young women to join a war against their fellow Muslims and their country of birth must be identified and brought to justice as soon as possible…

Here’s a Martin Amis-style thought experiment: Could there be some sort of connection between her youthful indiscretion and the decision of our Government in 2003 to flout international law and take part in an illegal invasion which left hundreds of thousands of people dead, destabilised the entire region and created millions of refugees? Some very powerful people in the government and the media are determined that such questions not be asked in the rush to condemn and castigate such a perfect scapegoat. According to another article in today’s Guardian, today marks 50 years since Rupert Murdoch, who was born in Australia and also holds an American passport, took control of The Sun newspaper.  I see this morning on Twitter that one of his protégées, Stig Abell, is applauding the Home Secretary’s decision. Abell was Editor-in-chief of The Sun when it published (that is to say, he published) a column by Katie Hopkins in which she called for boats full of refugees fleeing Isis to be bombed and advocated another “final solution”.

Now that’s pretty radical. Surely someone – the Home Secretary, perhaps – must be demanding that such an inhuman creature be brought to justice and his passport be removed? Er, no. He’s currently the Editor of the Times Literary Supplement.

I think I’ll stick with the LRB, thanks.

Govt to launch “LOOK OVER THERE!” initiative

A new nationwide campaign to encourage UK citizens and station visitors to stop paying too much attention to how Brexit is going has been launched tomorrow by Rail Minister Paul Maynard at London Waterloo.

Designed by government, police and the Associated Newspapers organisation, the new campaign aims to persuade people not to think about what their Government is up to and to raise awareness of the vital role the public can play in keeping themselves and others uninformed about the devastating effect Brexit is already having on their everyday lives.

Passengers arriving at major train stations tomorrow morning in London, Birmingham, Glasgow, and Manchester will be among the first to hear updated security announcements and see posters promoting the new “LOOK OVER THERE!” campaign message.

Everyone who uses the rail network is also being urged to pick up a copy of Metro newspaper and concentrate instead on whatever distraction Sajid Javid has come up with that morning.

Rail Minister Paul Maynard said:

“We want to send a clear message to anyone starting to realise that they have been lied to that there are thousands of pairs of eyes and ears ready to anticipate any potential threat to Brexit and pretend journalists working for a pretend newspaper who are prepared to write whatever shit those in power want them to.

“Today’s campaign is aimed at our railways but the recent incident at Charing Cross station, where a Leave voter from Kent on his way to work finally put two and two together and realised this whole thing is a massive fucking con, reminds us just how important it is to be vigilant.

“If that individual had merely glanced at the headline of that day’s Daily Mail-owned freesheet, their anger would have been displaced from how atrociously Theresa May is handling this utterly misconceived project onto an appropriate Government-approved scapegoat. I would urge anyone who spots anything unusual to glance at the headlines of the most-read daily newspapers and to allow their attention to be deviated.”

BTP Temporary Assistant Chief Constable Alun Thomas said:

“Don’t be afraid to believe anything that feels out of place. We rely on misinformation from the tabloid press, Sky and the BBC to help us keep Brexit even remotely credible.”

The grammar of Brexit

Countable nouns, verifiable items: Body bags, stockpiled cans of powdered milk for the baby, lost jobs, empty shelves, closed shops, bankrupt businesses, soldiers on the street, companies relocated overseas, skilled individuals forced to emigrate, food riots, jars of mouldy jam, percentages of GDP, dollars against the pound, days left til Farage can open the champagne, MPs with the courage to stand up and call Theresa May a liar…

Ineffable, abstract nouns, impossible to define, quantify or measure, thus open to abuse by demagogic politicians and media representing selfish hidden agendas: Destiny, sovereignty, national renewal, freedom, independence, control…

It’s not Ireland that craves colonial humiliation – it’s Brexit Britain

As a rule it’s best to avoid heeding whatever Brendan O’Neill writes on his mercenary trollsite ‘Spiked’, particularly as he only says such monstrously silly things in order to get attention, rather like a toddler triumphantly upending its own potty. His cabal of junior psychopaths are so very keen to promote themselves as contrarian iconoclasts that (as I found when I happened to be in the building which hosts their office a few months ago) one of them apparently subscribes to a magazine dedicated to private car registration plates. Chortle, chortle, what japesters they must be.

The reason it’s worth briefly lingering in the fetid afterstench of O’Neill’s latest brainfart is suggested by Fintan O’Toole’s book ‘Unheroic Failures: Brexit and the politics of pain’, in which he convincingly argues that two perverse fantasies swirl inside the Brexit nightmare: one, that the UK actually lost the Second World War, and two, that Britain was actually the victim, not the protagonist, of its Empire. Anyone who’s remotely concerned about Brexit needs to get hold of a copy and and read up on the psychopathologies that led us to this sad, sorry, borderline suicidal point.

Another very great book on the subject of Ireland, England and identity, one which I read several decades ago, was Declan Kiberd’s ‘Inventing Ireland’, in which he makes the case that the UK’s perceptions of its neighbour and oldest colony consist of projections of those aspects it most dislikes and/or fears in its own character: venal, lazy, superstitious, whimsical, drunken, alternately violent and docile, etc. This odd dynamic meant that Oscar Wilde was able to satirise the affectations and mores of the English upper classes in a way that no English writer could have done.

The notion, then, that Ireland wants to go back to being a colony, to be dominated by a more powerful political entity, is a projection. There is, it seems, a wish buried in our national psyche, a desire far too traumatic to ever be openly confessed to, of which Brexit is a perverted expression: Britons do actually want to be slaves. It’s not a case of the UK elite wanting to regain the Empire, but rather to relive it as reviled, humiliated and abject – as the Irishman O’Toole says, and the Englishman O’Neill would (pathologically) deny, the British (or at least the English) are not nostalgic for glory and heroically chasing their destiny, but rather drowning in resentment and craving self-pity.

Now given that this is exactly the sort of no-holds-barred contrarian hot-take that Spiked are celebrated for, it can only be a matter of hours til it appears on their front page. After all, they love free speech and challenging their readers almost as much as they do private car number plates. Amiright, “Breandán”?!

Timescales: Brexit and the climate

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I once read a chapter in a book about the nuclear industry which recounted debates related to the burying of nuclear waste in the Nevada desert. Given that depleted uranium has a half-life of 4.468 billion years, how can our civilisation signal to who or whatever inhabits our planet so far in the future that they must not dig too deep at certain locations? What symbols might represent danger for all conceivable life-forms?

I’ve been thinking about timescales, partly in relation to the above table presented by the physicist Jay Lemke in an equally head-spinning paper called ‘Across the scales of time‘. I came across it on a course I’m doing called, appropriately enough, Language and Power. It relates to educational processes but can easily be adapted to other contexts. Here, for example, is a timescale of my own invention:

  1. Jem Finer, formerly of The Pogues, has created a composition called ‘Longplayer’, which you can listen to here. You’re unlikely to get through the whole thing, as it’s 1,000 years in duration. In the meantime, you can also read a series of reflections in the form of exchanges of letters which ponder some of the cosmological and personal conundrums the piece evokes. Here’s one from the comedian Stewart Lee.
  2. The Nobel Prize-winning economist Elinor Ostrom drew on the ancestral wisdom of the Iroquois people in formulating her theses about sustainability. She urged humanity to always think seven generations into the future (around 150 years) when formulating policies.
  3. The British Meterological Office has warned that the target set by the Paris Agreement of restricting a rise in global temperatures to 1.5C could be breached within five years.
  4. Container ships setting off now from the UK which will not reach their destinations for at least 50 days may find that the goods they’re transporting may face an as-yet unknown tariff regime when they arrive, meaning they may never be unloaded.
  5. The Labour leadership has submitted a letter to the Government in which it details its preferences for what sort of arrangements it would like the UK to try to reach with the EU if it should ever come to pass that Britain should one day consider exiting the European Union. The Guardian article reporting on this omits to mention whether the letter was sent by first or second class post.
  6. The kettle is boiling.